Lately there have been some interesting and sometimes entertaining “conversations” between bloggers who don’t see eye to eye. I’m sure this phenomena of humans interacting with each other on less than bad terms has been around for a long time. After all we can’t possibly agree on everything we say, do and act on.
We all make mistakes, know people we respect and love and know others we detest. But is the latter an invitation to publicly slam others because they are doing things different from us?
I’d dare to say no!
See, I really don’t like arguments in the best of times but having said that, I’m no wall flower when it comes to standing up for my own integrity and beliefs. If this means that I have to dish out some colorful language, then so be it. But doing this in the public eye opposed to private is a whole different story.
In my years working in the hospitality industry I’ve used my own fair share of “colorful phrases” since it does come with the territory of working in a high pressure environment. The funny thing is that I never really saw it until I started my network marketing business. Engaging heavily into personal development the act of swearing has suddenly started to take a different meaning for me and I learned to re-educate myself in using a more appropriate approach to using language.
What’s with the personal insults?
It seems to me that just about everywhere I turn these days bloggers are getting very personal with their insults.
What bothers me in this whole scenario is the fact that instead of keeping the arguments on topic, bloggers have started to attack below the waist line with inappropriate abuse against people’s spelling mistakes, languages, etc. making the whole incident personal.
Question is, do we really need to go down this road?
Since we know nothing of other bloggers backgrounds, except what people choose to share with us or else if they are good friends what gives us the right to publicly slain another blogger below the belt?
Can’t we instead act like the civilized persons we ought to be and act with integrity and respect despite our disagreements?
I realize that we all act on emotion and beliefs which makes us only humans after all, but whatever happened to respect, I don’t know.
Do you buy into these arguments with your own attacks or do you rather choose to watch the spectacle from a distance?
Monika
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By the way in your second paragraph you misspelled “latter,” spelling it “later” instead. lol. Good post.
Chris: thanks for the hint. I amended it now.
Maybe they have been taught in a way that by creating controversies or word fights will get some attention from readers or they are just plain childish.
Anyway, I will avoid to comment and add my views on such matters unless the whole thing is clearly justified. Anyway, attacking on one’s grammatical or spelling mistake is a lame way to devalue a blogger.
Wayne: thank you for sharing your views on this. You are certainly spot on with your comment. I also agree that acting in this way is childish and lowly.
Maybe these people have a serious confidence issue or they are downright rude and have no idea about respect between humans.
Either way I take your stance and try to stay away from it all.
Attack the issue, not the person.
BTW, you mispelled “latter”, it should be “ladder”.
LMAO!
Pennsylvania: hahaha….no fighting here my friend. But you said it well enough. Having a healthy agreement involves staying on topic (the issue) and not engaging into personal attacks.
PS: actually it is “latter”
Hi - I have seen some pretty awful and insulting things on blogs, but i tend to ignore them.
I have also had someone not like what I was blogging about, then become annoyed because my opinion was not the same as hers.
But, I just ignored it. Sometimes we write about things we feel strongly about, and I for one, would not be bullied into changing my opinion, just because a reader disagreed.
CatherineL: I see were you are coming from and in all that’s fine. We don’t have to be pressured into changing our opinions at all.
Sometimes however somebody else’s blog post does put a certain aspect of our beliefs into a new light which might actually prompt us to change our mind still.
But like you said, bullying isn’t an option.
I don’t like it when I see bloggers insulting each other. I seriously doubt that they would do it face to face, and if you aren’t brave enought to do that, why insult people at all?
As for your question, I would almost certainly choose to watch, not participate
Jylan: interesting point about the face to face. In the end insulting others never brings any winners.
[...] reading Monika's article, "How Do YOU Deal With Blogger Agro?", I felt the need to air my own feelings along these [...]
You know, I had look up “agro” because I’ve never seen it before. Wouldn’t you know it? It only has ONE meaning.
R.T.: LOL, your comment actually prompted me to look it up too. I just used a slang word without realizing that some readers might be puzzled by the meaning.
The way I learned it is to do with aggravation, battle. Be interesting to see what you found.
sour1 [ˈsauə] adjective
having a taste or smell similar in nature to that of lemon juice or vinegar
Blogger Agro would be a blogger sourness or bitterness.
Though I believe bloggers really should be careful about our spelling and grammar, readers can only point out those tiny mistakes in the nicest way.
A book author once told, “Never argue with pigs because you only get dirty and they enjoy it.”
Nice post, Monika!
Kotsengkuba: that book author seems to be a very smart person indeed. Thank you for sharing this wisdom with us.
Maybe we can’t avoid a heated discussion with some colorful language now and then, but you’re right, there’s no need to go down to a personally insulting level. You run the risk of losing the respect of others if you yourself show no respect.
Tim: that is exactly my point. I’ve seen a disturbing effect that the lack of respect has had in the offline world in the last 10 years or so. On the chance of sounding ancient here back in the days when I went to school respect was a mainstay of the teaching curriculum.
Unfortunately somewhere along the lines this has gone lost in todays modern world, mainly to the fact that everybody sues the next door neighbor. Now teachers (at least in our country) have lost the right to teach respect the old fashioned way which in my eyes was the right way.
This has affected a whole generation and boundaries have been widened, which unfortunately has resulted in the lack of respect that is seemingly everywhere now.
Monika, I have a a post in my draft folder for sometime on this very subject , I alluded to it briefly in my last post, I think largely some people use this tactic as seed for controversy in hopes they might draw a few extra visitors. The problem is a different point of view often tracks its way into personal attacks. The line is crossed and in my mind credibility is out the window. Thanks for the post , as it did for RT it may inspire me to write my own, as I have much to say on this topic.
MakingSalesMakingMoney: Hi Don, I look forward to reading your post about this subject when you are going live with it. We can never write enough about these things to help combat the evil side of it all. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your views with us.
Hi Monika,
I’ve seen some of this type of interaction amongst bloggers, and it really turns me off. Wherever the root cause is derived from, sometimes the attacks go way too far and needs to be nipped in the bud.
Nothing deters me from returning to a blog more than seeing this kind of dribble taking place. I’m outta there and not going back.
Lin: it’s funny you mentioned the turn off. I think for me this depends, since sometimes a blogger is merely a host for an interesting discussion that has gone out of context.
But having said that, if this becomes the norm than “see ya later”.
Monika, it might be hard for me to relate that post to home based business. I use writing for stress relief and therapy actually so I’m not sure I will ever post it, the problem is people react to words instead of responding and there is a distinct difference. Our society has nurtured a generation into believing “its all about me” Call it the me generation, get what you can , as fast as you can, no matter the cost to others. If you have to belittle, demean or attack someone else with words, thats ok as lone as you get the desired outcome. See what I mean , that doesn’t really fit into the home based business niche , does it?
[...] and moved by two individual posts about the state of bloggers in regard to differences of opinion. Monika Mundell at The Writers Manifesto Blog and RT Cunningham at Untwisted Vortex offered opinions and thoughts that I shared and how those [...]
Thanks Monika , that post resented a perfect opportunity to show how differences can be handeled
Don: I’ve seen you post quickly last night and have yet to come and read it properly. I’ll be round later and you are welcome.
It’s great to see other bloggers taking their stances in a human way.
Hello Monika,
This article is on point those are my sentiments exactly. Why can’t we agree to disagree. I recently heard on a radio show that Arnold (Governor of California) and Maria are for two different political parties but they manage to agree to disagree.
Arlene: you said it, luckily there are bloggers who do that exactly which is a nice change in the whole merry-go-round.
[...] of engaging into a lively and productive “argument” we start to abuse, scream and shout. Regardless of where the place where the argument takes place, we can still act [...]
I get a kick out of it. Especially the grammar police. I can’t wait until someone comes to my blog and gives me shit.
Really, it depends on what it’s about. You shouldn’t hit below the belt, but you should be able to disagree with someone in an appropriate way.
@ Ellen: you made me laugh with your comment. Maybe I should take this opportunity and kick up a stir, but then your blog really isn’t the right platform to do this (too valuable) and it isn’t me anyway.
Like you said, agreeing is fine as long as it is done in a civilized manner.