I’ve Checked Out Of The Social Media Madhouse!
This is going to be an anti-social media post. So if you are an advocate of social media you might want to go back to tweeting your life away while I indulge into my little rant.
Social media marketing in my eyes is just an excuse for sucking up each other’s ass. Just look at Twitter, the perfect example. Follow me so that I can follow you back and if I don’t follow you, then you will eventually unfollow me – do you still follow?
What a load of utter bollocks!
You can probably guess by now that I’ve become seriously tired of all the hype that surrounds social media, while in fact it’s nothing else than a myriad of platforms that allow us to indulge in our sheep mentality. Yes, in case you haven’t figured it out yet, humans are sheep.
Any current craze will prove this to you. Social media is much the same. It’s a group of tight gurus who call the shots and when they say jump, we all do – except of course moi. I always hated jumping through a hoop just because I was told to do so. I rather choose my own hoop to jump through and it isn’t always making me the most popular girl in the room.
But then I rather keep my dignity and not suck up with the rest of them. * Note to myself “I can see this becoming another one of my classic rants.” – end note.
Suckers get more recognition!
It’s a known fact! Unless you suck up with the big guns you are only ever going to be a small fish in the eye of the public. One of our biggest failures as a human race is to oversee fake when we look at it. Why else would Mrs Hilton be such a revered loser? If you are not tight with the big boys you simply are not worth batting an eyelash at – nobody will give two hoots about you and your miserable little blog or will they?
Thankfully some people do. People with real characters, not the yes-sayers, sucker-upperers, hahaha… just made a new word. Any takers? Merriam?
People like me do NOT subscribe to the ‘follow the cool people police.’ Because people like me understand that the cool rulers make their own rules, as it pleases and serves them. We also know that cool is ALWAYS in the eye of the beholder and not something you should subscribe to because it is in fashion, or called social media!
Just to give you an idea who is on my cool list here are some people I really respect for their character traits and friendliness, and for sticking around despite my lack of being social: Brett @ 6 Weeks, Grizz @ Make Money Online, Terry @ Freelance Writer, Lis @ Passive Income Online, Kathy @ Virtual Impax (your last post on social media made me laugh), Cath Lawson, and Vic @ Make Money Blogging.
Interestingly, all the guys above share common character traits; they are honest, helpful, brazen, speak the truth no matter what, they go out of their way to help others in need, they are fun to be around and they ROCK! Welcome to my very own ‘cool group’ of bloggers!
Authenticity lost!
We have lost our own authentic beliefs. Instead of engaging our pink matter – the soft, wobbly bits called a brain – we holler and shout our association with Mr.X, the next best thing since sliced bread, until Mr. Y comes along.
My social media asylum test
I’ve tested my own theory for quite some time now. It was late last year when I first became aware of the fact that bloggers are just as bad when it comes to sucking up to each other. Let me explain.
When I first started out as a blogger I believed that in order to get a name for me online I needed to brand myself. Of course this is true. People won’t know about you until they know you exist. So one of the marketing strategies I employed was to visit other blogs and comment on their prose. I did this to the extent of spending 3 hours a day! yes, I know this is mad.
Soon enough I started to see a good influx of regular readers and people commenting on my own blog; this is also called the scratch my back and I scratch yours phenomena.
But after some months had passed I got sick of wasting my precious billable hours on something as anal as blog commenting. Seriously, it’s anal when you do it to the extent I did. I also figured that the whole social media blogging circus was one giant roundabout. If I refused to visit other blogs and leave a comment, the bloggers wouldn’t visit mine in return.
That’s when I realized – social media sucks and so does blogging, or at least the social ‘fake’ side of it.
I’m not against building genuine friendships online. Far from it actually. I have managed to make some REALLY good friends whom I trust totally since being in this circus.
But that’s not the point. Fact is, people online behave like social sheep that are led from one ‘cool’ guru to the next. All the while they don’t realize they are brought to the slaughterhouse for the taking. Why else would the Internet marketing industry be such an evergreen market? Ah yeah, I did forget the greed didn’t I?!
That’s why I checked out of the social media madhouse
If I was frequently visiting your blog before and now I don’t, please don’t take it personal. People I care about are still on my mind, most days. It just means that I brought some peace of mind into my life while extending the billable hours of my working day. It also means that I have reclaimed my life away from the constraints of social media living.
These days I hardly visit and read other blogs, I rarely comment on other people’s blogs, I refuse to suck up… still and I also lost most of the comments here as a result. Interesting – who would have guessed!
Just a few things to clarify
Despite my anti-social media feelings I still occasionally self-promote links on Twitter *gasp, do you really?
I also infrequently visit other networks such as Facebook, but these days I do it according to my rules and not the rules of social gurus. If I feel like being social, I venture out. If not. I keep my head tucked to my brains and focus on the things that REALLY matter in life!
Monika
About the Author: I'm a passionate freelance writer and problogger. To further build my business I'm also in the process of building my own niche empire which pays me residual income.
Brett Legree | Sep 2, 2009 | Reply
Monika – thank you. I guess we are here because you, too, are just like that – genuine, honest, a true friend.
You make me feel welcome here.
And to the meat of your post – AMEN.
I poke around on Twitter but it is mostly just a way to sling mud at Friar
I used to spend a lot of time “making the rounds” and then found the same thing you did, and more.
If I didn’t show up, the favour wasn’t returned, and the other thing I found in a few cases was, if I didn’t agree with the blogger all the time, it either got nasty or I was ignored!
So much for conversation, which is the fun part.
We always have a great conversation here, just like sharing coffee with friends.
I like what you said too about renewing your focus on the important – that is something we all must do, and you know what, the truly cool people understand this.
Monika | Sep 2, 2009 | Reply
@ Brett: Yes they certainly do. It’s a funny world out there at times and yet it is so darn beautiful too. But then the dark side and the bright side are never far from each other, are they?
I have a feeling that many more bloggers experience similar things in regards to social media and the ‘cool’ ones speak up about the truth of the matter (not that I’m cool or anything).
I know how much you used to go around and comment on other blogs. Heck, you WERE MR. EVERYWHERE and I often wondered how you did it. You made even my behavior look like a midget effort. LOL
But it’s friends like you and readers alike who keep me going, knowing you truly appreciate my effort.
I can’t wait to meet you guys (your family) in person one day. It will be a heck of a coffee saturated event. Perhaps with the odd beer thrown in here and there. Woohooo….
Thanks Brett!
Chris Anderson | Sep 2, 2009 | Reply
I’ve thought about this myself and I can’t say I blame you. I still use Twitter and Facebook quite a bit. But I don’t chase anyone. If I come across some great information awesome, but for the most part I use them to keep in touch and to share information I find that may be useful to others.
I think it’s easy to get into that follow mentality with these things. It seems like most of the people are just on there to have a large following and that’s it. It’s pathetic and not a way to build a relationship.
That was a good rant btw. I imagine you felt better after writing that eh?
~Chris
Mary E. Ulrich | Sep 2, 2009 | Reply
Just wanted you to know I read your post, want to encourage your independent thoughts and ask nothing in return.
Social media is a circus and we each have to decide if we are going to follow the elephants around the ring.
Allena | Sep 3, 2009 | Reply
As a freelance writer who works 6 hours daily from home, I use social media more personally then professionally. I guess I equate it to the water cooler. I’m sick of working, I get up, I walk over to you and see what you’re up to. You might tell me about your kid. You might tell me about what you’re currently working on. You might tell me I NEED to checkout such and such product. It’s all good, cause when I’m done, I go back to my desk.
Wendi Kelly | Sep 3, 2009 | Reply
Monica,
You may be surprised how many of us are still here. I just can’t give up the time I used to posting on every site I read. I used to feel it was my desire ( still is) and also somewhat my polite obligations ( too make everyone feel good)to leave a comment so they would know I stopped by. It’s never been tit for tat with me, it was always about leaving a smile at the door. But..alas…I just can’t spare the time any more and I suspect others are in my shoes as well. Blogging, twitter, facebook…um..we do have this thing called *real* life and mine is pretty darn busy! Socal media is a hobby not my paying job!
but I haven’t left you. your posts may pile up until I am reading three or four at a time…but you do get read. I am faithful.
Buck Weber | Sep 3, 2009 | Reply
Nice rant! Congrats on checking out. I wrote a piece a few weeks ago about how I never checked in. You can read it here if interested: http://thebucklist.blogspot.com/2009/07/ten-months-out-confession-of-lazy.html
Keep up the good work, I enjoy reading your posts.
barbara lovas | Sep 3, 2009 | Reply
Even thought I don’t post comments much, I had to comment this time.
You have given me so much helpful info. I always enjoy your blogs. Thanks for all you do!!! Hang in there.:)
Barbara
Earl Gile | Sep 3, 2009 | Reply
I just want to say I have benefited from reading your blog and I enjoy your blog. I am now selling my writings because of your blogs. I am a little anti-social media myself. I was just going to sign up to twitter recently but I wonder if it would be worth my time now. Your blog has opened my eyes to what is going on in social media. Thank you Earl
Monika | Sep 3, 2009 | Reply
@ Chris: You bet I felt better! That post has actually been brewing in my mind for quite some time and surprisingly the social media police have yet to come and knock on my door. Where are they all?
Ah yeah, how can I forget. They are too busy tweeting.
What you said about building a large following seems exactly to be the problem with the essence of social media. Designed to stay in touch with friends it has become a pathetic (your word
) tool to boast about ones huge list of followers. Thank you Chris for caring. I really appreciate your support.
Monika | Sep 3, 2009 | Reply
@ Allena: I really like how you made the analogy about the water cooler. VERY suave! It’s also nice to have you here on my blog since I believe this to be your first comment. So welcome to you Allena.
Seeing how you treat social media is a nice refreshing sight since you seem to have it all under control. I think the key here is to use social media for personal purposes rather than trying to follow the rest of the wold because trying to do that is ever so tiring and time consuming. I appreciate your pointers, thank you.
Monika | Sep 3, 2009 | Reply
@ Buck Weber: Hi Buck and welcome to my humble abode. I just stopped over to read your post and found it to be a truthful account of most bloggers’ feelings and experience. I appreciate your feedback about my blog because it helps me to see if I still hit those notes with my readers.
It’s also good to see I didn’t scare you off with my rant, hehehe… I promise to be good (well, most of the time anyway).
Monika | Sep 3, 2009 | Reply
@ Wendi: Hey Wendi, it has been a while either end but what you just wrote really helped to make my day. Thank you! I haven’t forgotten you either. You are still one of the ‘original crowd’ and you are in my heart even so I do not stop by on your blog simply for the reasons stated above (time).
It’s good to see you have experienced similar notions. I did love what you said about leaving a smile at the door because for me it was always about maing people happy as best as I can. This is the one major reason I’m still blogging here. I do know that my blog helps a lot of newcomers find their feet and reading comments like Earl’s bring me back to mother earth knowing I’m on the right track.
So thank you for being a friend Wendi. I really appreciate your supporting words.
Monika | Sep 3, 2009 | Reply
@ Barbara Lovas: Hi Barbara and welcome to my site. I feel honored by your unusual venture out into blog commenting land.
Seriously though, I do appreciate your nice words. It’s words like these that keep me going and infuse me with renewed confidence that there are in fact real people out there who read my blog, not just spammers who copy and steal my content.
Don’t worry, I’m not intending to check-out real soon unless someone crazy enough offers me a REALLY good deal for this site (hahaha… that will be the day). I tried to visit your blog but it seems down? Are you aware of this?
Monika | Sep 3, 2009 | Reply
@ Earl Gile: Hi Earl, I still remember your email a couple of weeks back or so. Wow, I’m so happy to have helped you to earn money! Woohoo! One big cheers for you my friend. Thank you for stopping by and caring. I really appreciate this. I’m now raising my flat white (a type of coffee) to you and say hip, hip, hooray!
Keep up the great work Earl, you are only just beginning. Imagine what exciting roads lie in front of you to still be discovered.
Steve Sherron | Sep 4, 2009 | Reply
Holy Cow! We may be brother/sister from the same mother. I found you through your comment on Lis’s blog. We think alike and I thought I had coined the term Twitter Sheep. Seems like you were already calling all the sucky suck-ups sheep. Most of Twitter makes me spit up in my mouth. You may or may not have seen the Brogan spoof I did but it was because of all the Brogan @ss suckers. Mr. Social Media is probably a decent guy but he is taking the zombies to the bank.
I figure all these people so involved in social media and re-tweeting the A-listers are just trying to get their profile pic in the twitter stream. I doubt most of these sheep even know the name of their next door neighbor. I’m glad I found you and I’ll be checking back in.
Monika | Sep 5, 2009 | Reply
@ Steve: Woohoo… I’ve got a new brother, nice to meet you man.
I haven’t see your Brogan spoof but you certainly made me itch to check it out now. You’re certainly right with that belief of yours whereas celebrity suckers are nothing else than leeches trying to attach themselves to the fame in order to get a tiny slot in the limelight themselves. It’s pathetic really.
This blog post has been simmering on the pot for a long time really. It has always bothered me how people could be so superficial while pretending to network with each other (I’m talking about the suckers here, BTW) but in the end it just came out. I guess we are spirits alike with the same attitude and weird sense of humour while priding ourselves on being honest and for real. Anyway Steve, I’m glad you stopped by and I look forward to getting to know my new bro.
Allyn | Sep 7, 2009 | Reply
My goal is to get 800,000 Twitter followers and then charge noobs $50 to tweet out the name and a link to their website. I figure I could make some big bank that way! LOL … oh, wait, people are already doing that aren’t they?
Great rant Monika!
AL
Monika | Sep 9, 2009 | Reply
@ Allyn: Hey, great plan. Just a shame you are late in suckering people into this scheme.
It’s great to see you here Allyn, love your videos by the way. They are a hoot!
Cath Lawson | Sep 18, 2009 | Reply
LOL Monika – I know you don’t use Facebook much. I only just joined a little while ago and you still didn’t add me and I can’t read your stuff until you do.
I’m glad I’m still on your cool list though. I haven’t been blogging much this year, which is why I haven’t been round much to comment.
And I still haven’t really got into the swing of social media. I like talking to my online friends sometimes but none of the so called gurus will follow me back. I think some of them don’t like me because I make fun of the “six figure bloggers” and other such bullshit.
Joe | Sep 21, 2009 | Reply
Someone will eventually calculate how much time, effort, money and productivity is lost by continuous streams of tweets (many of which are now totally automated), Facebook updates, etc. (ad nauseum), comments to blogs, follow-up comments to comments on blogs, edits to blog posts, edits to follow-up comments on blog post edits … well the list just goes on and on … people may wake up.
I fully expect a Social Media syndrome at some point where Doctors start prescribing real drugs for this virtual drug called Social Media (and insurance companies will really be keen to paying for that treatment).
People everywhere … “get a life” is not a cliche. Ashton Kutcher is not a Twitter god, and I for one could give a rats behind about him and 99.99999% of all tweets (no, make that 100%).
Take off your shoes now and go walk on the grass in your backyard or visit the beach and feel the sand on between your toes; turn the computer off (to save some energy if anything) and get some fresh air. I am … see ya!
Monika | Sep 21, 2009 | Reply
@ Joe: Amen! Love the way your mind works Joe. I think you are not far off the outlook of social media. Social media pills? Now that made me crack up. But then it will be the grounds for a whole new industry to make money, right?